mindCON : the diary of a madmind...: Immortality...

I imagine that I'm a lonely, lonely red blood cell lost somewhere in the extremities of the vast and complex system of blood vessels and capillaries. I'm bumbling around, caught up in the great grand pulsing bursts shuddering out from the heart of the city. I'm floating, lonely and isolated in the empty expanse of plasma.

(Jaron, ZMF)

And yes, I'm still reading Zen Motherfuckers. Taking my time, taking it in. Jaron did a good job of bringing me into his world and into his shoes. Wait... I am in that world. Just not in his shoes. I guess it's cos I could relate to the things he wrote about. I remember watching this TV show Sync or Swim hosted by the ex-MTV VJ Jamie years ago. Basically he was sent to a certain location in the world (usually rich in culture) and is forced to learn a specific part of the culture. A dance, a song, a language. In two weeks, he has to perfect whatever he was learning or... he swims. Thought the show was really cool and it kinda relates to how life has thrown me a heap of heebie jeebies and inspires me to stay with the flow and be in sync with the surroundings.

Like a chameleon.

The present life of man, O king, compared with that space of time beyond, of which we have no certainty, reminds me of one of your winter feasts, where you sit with your generals and ministers. The hearth blazes in the middle and a grateful heat is spread around, while storms of rain and snow are raging without. Driven by the chilling tempest, a little sparrow enters at one door and flies delighted around us till it departs through the other. Whilst it stays in our mansion it feels not the winter storm ; but when this short moment of happiness has been enjoyed, it is forced again into the same dreary tempest from which it had escaped, and we behold it no more. Such is the life of man, and we are as ignorant of the state which preceded our present existence as of that which will follow it. Things being so I feel that if this new faith can give us more certainty, it deserves to be received...

(Emerson, Immortality)

I believe in deciding my own path and I believe in greatness and in immortality. I believe in a lot of things but what's important... I believe in me. What happens in the end is solely dictated by the choices and decisions I make, which of course makes me fully responsible for whatever outcome that results from it.

I make me. I break me.

My personal mantra that I've kept faithful to all these times and the thing that keeps me going. Since we only get to live once, I, want to live forever. Whether there's a heaven or hell, I'll worry about that when I pass. For now, I will be the Wanderer. Learning everything and absorbing bit by bit, the vast energy emitted by Gaia. There is no light at the end of the tunnel for me, for there is no end to this tunnel I am in. But I'm not complaining... Life has been good to me...